I Destroyed Our Starlink: Perfectionism, Pride, and a Power Cable

How Could We Not Notice?

The first time it happened, we brainstormed how to keep it from happening again. To no avail.

We were camping in Louisiana, the same place we had power issues (read about it here: https://www.juliergreenwalt.com/post/the-pop-we-didn-t-want-to-hear). Rain was pouring down as we ran to the truck and jumped in. About eight or ten miles down the road, we pulled into a Walgreens parking lot to pick up a prescription. But who was this guy and what was he doing, waving and calling to us from his delivery truck?

He just wanted to point out the tail we were dragging down the road. Nearly 50 feet of our Starlink Mini power cable.

It Seemed Like a Good Idea at the Time

Here’s how it works. We attached our Starlink Mini to the top of the truck using a strong magnetic mount. While the truck is running, the Mini is powered by the AC plug in the bed of the truck. But in a campground with poor cell reception, we can't leave the truck running all the time, so we plug the Mini into an outlet on the outside of the fifth wheel.

Yeah, you guessed it. We forgot to unplug it.

The good news is that no damage was done. Miracle, right? And that’s when we brainstormed ways to never forget it again. We thought of putting a chip clip on the steering wheel, posting a note on the window of the truck or RV door, or maybe draping the cord in such a way that we’d trip over it. I’m sure you can think of even more potentially foolproof methods than we did.

Because I just did it again two days ago. And this time, the results were devastating.

My Turn to Forget

Roger is traveling with his brothers in Mexico this week and I was feeling rather proud of maintaining the RV by myself. I plugged in the heated hose, turned on the tank heater during freezing nights, and dumped the black and gray water tanks—all of which are normally Roger’s lookout. But it was the combo gas and grocery store trip that did in my pride. Besides diesel, all I wanted was a couple of salads, milk, and broccoli. Pushing the grocery cart out to the truck, I saw it. The cable was dangling, frayed like a wimpy extra-long lion’s tail.

Maybe I should’ve tried draping the cable at neck height.

Since the day Roger boarded the plane, I’d been reminding myself over and over, Unplug that cable if you go anywhere in the truck. And then stepped right over it without noticing.

The Bully in My Head: Where Perfectionism and Pride Come In

Have you ever overlooked something simple and had to deal with the consequences? Have you ever been so focused on a goal that everything else moves out of focus?

By default in life, I tend to be closer to the task-oriented end of the scale as opposed to relationship-oriented. For the first 50 years of my life, I regularly chose “doing my job” over being concerned about the people in my life. It seemed easier, cleaner, less liable to present roadblocks in my life.

Then I discovered the “want-to-be-right” bully in my head. What an eye opener. I saw my whole life differently. I had been paying lip service to the mantra “love God, love people” while the real mantra in my head was more like “love God and get everything right.” I was so focused on doing everything right—in fact, being right—that everything else faded in importance. It wasn’t just my personal appearance that had to be "right," but also my job performance, parenting my children, and my church involvement—all without much attention to what was going on in other people's hearts. And the corollary to that kind of perfectionism is not wanting others to see my mistakes. So not only did I put high value on being correct and doing things right; I also used perfectionism as a mask and a wall that could hide my imperfections.

Where True Transforming Power Comes From

The Starlink cable destruction just highlighted what’s changed for me in the past decade. Since unmasking that inner bully, it's easier to admit when I’m wrong or don’t know something. I’m more likely to be vulnerable and ask for help and input, and enjoy the relationship-building that comes as a result. I laugh at myself more often and invite others to laugh with me at the ridiculous chain of events that leads to something like destroying a Starlink Mini power cable.

Each of us has a natural bent that, when left unchecked, leads to development of an inner bully of some kind. It might be a people-pleasing bully, or a shame bully. It might be a control bully or a perspective bully. God’s continual transformation of his children is the only way we can first recognize, then tame those bullies. Some need redirection, like the pride bully being turned into an ally that gives God all the credit for who we are, what we have, and what we do. Other inner bullies need to be reframed so they stop compelling us in self-destructive ways.

Unmasking my primary inner bully is what led me to write Turning Your Inner Bullies Into Allies So You Can Love Like Jesus. As a recovering perfectionist, I want to help others remove, redirect, and reframe these inner bullies that create obstacles to our spiritual growth.

Reflections of the One Who Made Us

You and I were made to reflect God’s characteristics: honesty, righteousness, purity, love, and more. But when we skew His perfect character traits, as I did by twisting His righteousness to reflect my righteousness, we steal His glory for ourselves.

And that’s how a destroyed Starlink power cable highlights God’s power to change this leopard’s spots. The perfectionism and pride bullies that dictated so much of my behavior in the past lost a lot of their power simply by being recognized and accurately named. I’m so grateful God cares as much about shaping my heart as He does about fixing the things I accidentally drag behind me.

But whenever someone turns to the Lord, the veil is taken away. For the Lord is the Spirit, and wherever the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord—who is the Spirit—makes us more and more like him as we are changed into his glorious image. 2 Corinthians 3:16-18

If you'd like to learn more about defusing your inner bullies, you can sign up on my contact page to be notified when Turning Your Inner Bullies Into Allies is released in spring 2026.

(P.S. All is not lost with our Starlink Mini. A replacement power cable is being shipped as I write. I’ll keep you posted.)

Have you ever lost focus on what’s most important? Maybe with consequences, minor or major? What was the lesson for you? Share in the comments below.